Today I received an email from an old friend. Well, actually it was from her mother, sister and daughter. They must have sent the invitation to her memorial to everyone in her email address book. At my age loosing friends is part of life and to be expected. There is more to this story.
Christine and I met when my son and her daughter attended the same grade school in the early nineties. Christine and I worked together on several school events and became friends. The four of us started doing things together and our friendship grew. One of our favorites was driving to Eastern Washington to visit Grandpa Bud. Bud lived on a small ranch and had horses and a few head of cattle. We would spend the weekend riding horses, relaxing and visiting with our hosts.
In the late nineties when my family moved to a southern part of the state, it seemed too far to travel for either of us so we gradually lost contact. You know how it is. Softly, like a clearing mist, the friendship simply dissolves into living a new life.
Last Winter I found Christine again and we spoke several times on the phone and exchanged a few emails. Our lives had changed, but shared experiences retained a tenuous bond. I said I would plan a visit the next time I traveled to Washington.
Summer. I’m out of desert heat and enjoying a particularly beautiful season in the Pacific Northwest. It is my intention to visit with my old friend. But it was an interesting, challenging and busy Summer, so finding a weekend, since Christine works, just didn’t happen.
Here is where the point of my story finally emerges.
I could have made it happen.
Plans could have been changed.
Excuses are easy.
Taking time for friends should never be pushed aside.
You never know when an opportunity to see an old friend is the last one.
Such regrets have entered my life before. I hereby resolve to NEVER let them in again.
I urge you to take the time now. You never know when it will be too late. What seems difficult now, could become impossible at any moment.
Christine and Amanda on Tom in 1993
So very true.
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry that it turned out this way. But don't beat yourself up.....there is no way you could have known. I agree that it is important to take the opportunities we are given to keep friendships. The people in our lives are the most valuable part of them.
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry about the loss of your friend. What you say is very true - things intervene with the best of intentions. We should all make more time for friends, but we drift away. It sounds like you have some wonderful memories of your times together.
ReplyDeleteThe older you become the more true your words will be. Losing older friends/family, and contemporary friends is difficult enough and becomes more frequent with age, but younger friends leaving life first is more unexpected. So, yes, we can never assume those we care about will probably be around and we'll catch them "next time" or "later." Even knowing this, life does intervene and we let opportunities pass us by. This line you wrote is pure poetry: "Softly, like a clearing mist, the friendship simply dissolves into living a new life." Be kind to yourself and treasure your memories.
ReplyDeleteRG, So sorry for your loss.
ReplyDeleteI guess we all let life get in the way of connecting with the ones we love and care about. "Softly, like a clearing mist, the friendship simply dissolves into living a new life." However, I will say there is nothing better then catching up with that special friend and seemingly picking up right where you both had left off, as if time had stood still.
Cherish the special memories, make it a point to connect with the ones we love AND let them know it.
Joyce, I offer condolences for your regret. I personally do not know how to do life without having some regret. Relationships are the most important things. I know I cannot give enough of ME away to my friends like you, and am humbled by the effort. Be glad that you knew her for a season and that you are reminded again how precious each friend is. Blessings, Rod from the right seat
ReplyDeleteJoyce, I offer condolences for your regret. I personally do not know how to do life without having some regret. Relationships are the most important things. I know I cannot give enough of ME away to my friends like you, and am humbled by the effort. Be glad that you knew her for a season and that you are reminded again how precious each friend is. Blessings, Rod from the right seat
ReplyDelete